Friendships

Many challenges face the Christian  today. One of the major challenges is the courage to maintain their walk with Christ among peers and friends who do not have a relationship with Him. Some struggle greatly in this area which results in the Christian teen in friendships that are bad for them. Many Christian teens know they are in bad friendships, but do not know how to walk away from them. In this week’s post, we want to provide some instructions for freedom from friendships that are unwholesome and unhealthy.

1. Consider your walk with the Lord above their feelings.  

Some teens do not want to hurt the individual’s feelings. They are concerned about what the others will think of them. However, you are being unfair to yourself if you remain friends with someone that could hinder your walk with God and affect your life in a negative manner.

For do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ. (Galatians 1:10)

2. Trust God for wisdom on what to say and do. 

Some teens feel they do not know what to say or that they may not be able to say it properly. However, God will give grace and wisdom to say what has to be said in order to dissolve the harmful friendship.

If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. (James 1:5)

3. Recognize when you do not want to let them go. 

Some Christian teens use other excuses to remain friends with an individual because they do not want to let them go. However, the Christian teen must acknowledge this and ask Christ for strength to make the proper decision. The Christian teen has to deny himself.

Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.(Matthew 16:24)

4. Prayerfully make new friends. 

Most people do not want to be alone. This is true especially of teens. Therefore, to avoid going back into bad friendships, new ones have to be formed. Again, God is faithful and will help lead you into the right friendships.

I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye. (Psalm 32:8)

5. Strengthen your walk with Christ and other Christians. 

In order to overcome bad friendships, you may not need to make new friends, but strengthen existing good friendships. In addition to this, a strong personal walk with the Lord will help during times of transition where fear and loneliness can attack the mind and heart.

Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. (Ephesians 6:10)

Well, there you have it. Until next time, remain faithful to Him who has called you, who will bring all things to pass. I have addressed this topic in detail in my book,  

Good and Bad Friends – examples from the Bible

I was reading the Youth section in Herald (June 17, 2007) and I’d like to share the following article with all of you. I guess, we all had a share of having true friends that stick with us through thick and thin as well some not-so-true friends. The article gave some examples of men and women from the Bible who are good and bad friends. So, I am reproducing here for you who didn’t managed to get the publication; here it is:

A Good Friend Looks like:-

• RUTH (Ruth 1:1-22)- ‘who is loyal even when in times of difficulty. When Naomi told Ruth to stay behind, Ruth said these words, “Where you go, I will go, and where you stay i will stay”.’
• JONATHAN (1 Samuel 20:1-42) -’ who risks his life for a friend. He helped his friend, David’s life when he heard that his father King Saul wanted to kill him. He told David, “Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do it for you.”‘
• PAUL (1 Corinthians 4:14-6:20) – ‘a great man who helps friends grow in their faith, by encouraging them and being bold enough to correct them.’
• JESUS – What a friend we have in JESUS!! The epitome of a true friend. ‘Compassionate, encouraging, patient, loyal, understanding, loving’. To be a good friend, let us “clothe” ourselves with the things of God (Colossians 3:12-17)

Now, let’s go to the examples of a bad friend:-

• Pharaoh’s Cupbearer (Genesis 40:1-23) – Joseph promised him that he would soon be released from prison, but once the cupbearer went out from jail, he forgot all about Josesph. This guy does not show appreciation to his friend.
• Ahithopel ( 2 Samuel 15:12-17:23) – King David’s betrayer, he befriends an enemy who wanted to overthrow the kingdom. He was also ‘David’s trusted counsellor, but he gives lousy advice and spread rumours about the king’.
• Judas (Matthew 26:15-17, 25; Luke 22:47-48)- who acts like a friend but puts his own self-interests above everything else.

I really really hope that you could get the publication as the article embodies the essence of what friendship is all about. I thank the author for writing the beautiful article and hopefully, this piece would inspire you as much as it has inspire me.

Proverbs 14:20 NIV
The poor are shunned even by their neighbors, but the rich have many friends.

Proverbs 22:24 NIV
Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered,

1 Corinthians 15:33 NIV
Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”